20 First Dates - Part Three

20 First Dates questions I have been asked, and answers I have given.

How long did it take you to go on 20 first dates? Did you have to do it in one month? Confession: I didn’t actually go on 20 first dates. At least, not if you only count the dates since the challenge started. I got pretty close, and it remains to be seen if I get there. Remember, this is about the process of self-discovery – not about the dates or the people themselves. There is no time limit to self-discovery.

What defines a date? The definition of a date was very loose. The dates could have been a coffee, a drink, a lunch, a dinner, or a play…

How did you meet that many people? They were fairly evenly divided between real life, meeting people at events or via friendly introductions; Facebook friends and/or Facebook setups by friends; and the only app I’ve tried, Bumble (I have no idea if it is better, worse or indifferent compared to other apps – I just know that it was what my single girlfriends were primarily using).

What number was I? If you were one, you may know because I have already told you. If you want to know, just ask and I will tell you (and yes, I have been asked, and have told).

I had planned to write this next post in the series on “Learning to be Alone.” However, after the recent holiday weekend, I must take a detour on this journey, and talk about family, closure and acceptance.

Divorce doesn’t break the bonds of family.

Growing up, my parents gave me a great example of how divorced parents can show each other grace. My father would still participate in family gatherings on my mother’s side, and my paternal grandparents always treated my mother as their daughter – they even served as my mother’s witnesses when she remarried. Was there sometimes tension? Yes. However, they created a peace around the situation and we never had reason to feel anything but loved.

If you knew me a year and a half ago, you may have been privy to my marriage falling apart. Without getting into details that are not important at this stage, let’s just say that my ex and I have both worked on finding peace within ourselves and with each other, and creating a parenting partnership